Any questions?
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In an effort to prove wrong the multiple women who have come into my life optimistic for a relationship, and then exited quickly, proclaiming, “There’s no hope for you!”; I’ve decided to have a child.
A child would be the perfect vehicle for displaying my high level of responsibility, value of human life, and my quote-unquote “feelings” (which I do have, thank you very much!).
Therefore, any willing hosts should apply by leaving a comment after this post.
Thank you.
Please only serious inquiries. I hold full discretion to refuse services of applicants I deem not suitable. By volunteering for this opportunity, you are obligated to accept my biological material by an act of my choosing. I am also in no way liable for your health, feelings, or desire for relationship during the terms of our agreement. Actually, there will be no relationship, and should you, at any time, happen to be in close proximity with me, my child, and a potential romantic interest, you are to act like we don’t know each other. In fact, it might be best if we don’t know each other. Offer not valid in Arizona.